All posts for the month February, 2013

My Lifetime Original Movie based Life

Published February 22, 2013 by crayolasandcombatboots

Yes, I have felt lately that my life is based on a Lifetime Original Movie. You know the kind where there are lies, manipulations and cover ups.

My whole life I was lied to about who my Dad was and the circumstances of my birth. As a result I grew up feeling like a throw away. My self-esteem was always low and I couldn’t accept love fully.

On Saturday, Feb. 9th that all changed. I met my Dad for the first time since I was 6 months old. This Sunday the 24th I will be 37 years old. That is too long for somebody to go without their Dad. How is it like a Lifetime Movie, for starters The lies.

The lies started with who my Dad was( I was given the wrong name my whole life)

The manipulations: While my real Dad was otherwise occupied(that is a whole other Lifetime Movie) I was hidden from him and his family and sub sequentially adopted in a closed adoption.

The Cover-up: My Grandmother keeping hush-hush about my real Dad’s identity. Brainwashing everybody to follow the same Mantra .

Yes, there were the occasional slip ups that would have led you to the right ending(just like in a movie when there is a twist and you think it’s going to turn out the other way)However the script is usually followed with no ad libs. My Grandmother was a great Director who should win an Academy Award.

That all came to a Climactic conclusion That Saturday when the truth was revealed(That will be another Blog post within the next week) The lies all started coming out and the happy ending with my Dad and I hugging and me looking into his eyes and having all the pieces just start falling into place.

My conception and birth was not a catastrophic event that was due to bad circumstances. I learned that I was made out of love and that my Dad had tried to find me for years and had always had that same hole in his heart. That same hole that I had growing up. Both of our holes are finally able to be filled.

I have a Dad that anybody would be proud to have. He is a kind, caring soul and I can finally see myself in someone else. We only met less than 2 weeks ago but I can’t imagine my life without him.